Thursday, August 30, 2012

Bikers and Buttheads


So I decided to ride my bike to school today. Not during the day, mind you, but tonight when it was late and no one was on the road. It took me 12 minutes to get there and 15 minutes to get back, but let me tell you folks- it was the most horrifying 27 minutes of my entire life.
There are a lot of things that can happen in 27 minutes. You can unwrap every gift under the Christmas tree, you can draw a picture, chase and armadillo, put on a skit, bake a pie or kick a can down a very long road, but in these last 27 minutes I did none of those enjoyable things.
Instead I pedaled up a very long hill, had to stop to catch my breath because I’ve misplaced my inhaler (again), fly down that very big hill (panicking all the way) and deal with very unsavory people.
What were these nincompoops doing? Well let’s just say they were acting like orifices that push out the excrement of donkeys. The first trucker (and when I say that I really do mean a very large truck that I presume was being driven by a male) came towards me and honked. 



It’s nighttime. Stephenville is dark because it’s a country town with not many street lights. I’m a wuss. And the only thing from keeping me becoming a complete organ donor is my helmet. So let’s just say that I jumped... a little...

Okay actually I jumped so hard that I had trouble keeping my bike on the road. At that point I choked it up to bad timing and cautious drivers. But by the third time it happened I realized that these jerks were just doing it to do it.
It finally got to the point where a couple cars swerved at me. I’m sorry but what part of me riding by the side of the road at night makes it okay to drive closer to me? This is Stephenville, people! You don’t have to remind me how bumpy the grass is! It’s been plowed on for generations! So don’t run me off the road- it’s not funny.

Yes, I can see your big truck. Yes, I know you’re overcompensating for something. You don’t need to be a bully to substantiate your manliness.

I can ride with no hands on my handlebars. It’s something that I’ve trained myself to do. I have even read a book while riding my bike, and if these disgustingly moronic guys (I would put money on the fact that they are plowboys) I will buy a gun and I will carry it in one hand when I ride my bike. If they come too close to me again I will go all Princess Merida on them and shoot out their tires while they’re driving. 


Autarchy and Amputees

So I feel like I'm being a complete control freak. I'm trying this crazy new "diet" which really isn't a diet but a complete and utter change in lifestyle. It's working pretty good, but with so many changes going on in my life I don't know how long I can keep it up.
Anyway, I feel like my new food choices have also affected the way that I am keeping my apartment. It's not a bad thing- it's just that I'm freaking out over every little thing that's out of place. My roommate probably hates me but I've labeled all the cabinets and divided up our space meticulously. It may be that  I'm just desperately trying to stay on track with the food stuff and if I have a messy kitchen I won't feel like cooking, so I am being a neat freak right now.
Oh well...
Also I would like to point out that I have seen more amputees this week than I have ever seen in my life. I don't know if we just have a whole lot of soldiers on our campus or what, but I would like to tip my hat to them... that is if I was wearing a hat. They'll just have to be happy with me flipping my bangs for now.

Wednesday, August 29, 2012

Janitors and Juice Breaks

Yum... juice. I was really thirsty so I bought some from STARBUCKS in the library :) This will probably be my only Starbucks this semester because I'm really stingy when it comes to stuff like that.

Anywho I'm sitting here drinking this wonderful blend of fruit flavored goodness when this janitor lady  passes by. I can hear her cleaning the bathroom for a few minutes when someone radio's her on her walkie talkie. I can't hear what they said but it must have been important because she yells "10-4!" and takes off running...

Oh man guys... we've got a janitorial emergency on Campus today! There's no more toilet paper on the first floor common area! AHHHHHH!!!

(P.S. Just to avoid anyone thinking that I'm demeaning her job- please remember that I was a janitor this summer and hold every right to be sarcastic when it comes to this matter. That is all).

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Rice Cakes and Dirty Diapers


My first day on the job! I'm so excited to become an afternoon day care teacher :D. I was placed in two nurseries today- one from 1-2:30 and the next from 2:30-4. I really enjoyed both and I hope I get put in one of them for good.

At this particular day care there are babies as young as 3 months and kids as old as 11. I could be anywhere in between but my heart is really for those little guys.
So far everything is going good! I was shown around the building again when I got there, just to refresh my memory and then I went to Nursery 2- which is Crawlers. They are so adorable. We had 5 babies today. 
Baby L is so cute! She looks just like my little sister did when she was smaller, but she has more hair than Kathryn did at that age. She's so funny because she'll cry anytime anyone else starts crying. It's like she forgets that she's sad and they remind her!
Baby E is such a sweet little man! He's the third oldest in the class but he's the smallest. He has these adorable brown eyes and this pacifier that has a stuffed triceratops attached. Uber adorable.
Baby J is a fashionista! Her mama has her hair pulled so tightly into it's little ponytail I'm surprised it doesn't give her a headache. She was also sporting a little black bow on the top of her head and when it fell off she cried until I replaced it.
Baby W is the baby baby of the group. He still looks more like an infant than a toddler and is just starting to pull himself up onto things. He’s a stinker, though. I had to change his diaper today and boy was he a wiggly worm!
Baby B was so funny :D She reminds me of a friend with the same name. Even her little facial expressions caught me off guard because they were so similar. She’s fully walking, but isn’t graduating for a few weeks because she’s really young. She’s so smart already, though and I can tell that she’s going to be a handful.
We played for a while and then it was time to move on to the next room. I went over to Nursery 3 which is walkers. Basically they’re in this room from when they start walking to when they turn 3. All of the kids in this class were absolutely adorable. So many of them reminded me of kids at my previous daycare- both in social aspects as well as physical characteristics. There was a little girl (Baby M)that just looked so similar to the Baby E.M. at the FBC CDC (Janet and Mom- you’ll know who I’m talking about). She’s so little and even wore cute mismatching clothes!
Baby K is an adorable little tomboy. She’s the oldest and shyest in the class.
Baby T is so cute, but likes to have things his way. Which is alright when you’re so small that I can control everything about your day. He’s going to have to learn that it’s not all about him someday, but for now it’s pretty stinkin’ adorable. 
Baby C is super cute too! He’s so animated in his noises!
We had rice cakes for snack and then it was time for me to go. They usually stay till about 5:30, but since it was my first day they gave me a break! I can’t wait for tomorrow!!
Wish me luck :D

Crickets and Crime Scenes


Today I found out that my apartment is very easy to break into. Why would I know this? Well because I had to climb through my window- that’s why!

The first thing I learned about our new apartment is that we are currently at war with the crickets. If you’ve never had to fight with them you probably have never had an experience like this. They’re not sneaky like cockroaches, and not as gross as flies. But by jove are they annoying! They’ll just creak and chirp all night and day. I have a feeling that God Himself regrets making such an unnerving, shrill sound come out of them.

I did not ask for this war and, unfortunately, it looks like I’m losing. I had about six hours of disturbed sleep last night as there were multiple armies of black hoppers creating a sonata in my window. Yes you heard me right- IN the window. I couldn’t see them, I couldn’t chase them away, but I could hear them. All. Night. Long.

Today when I got back from work (YAY first day! You’ll hear about it later c:) I decided to do something about it. Not thinking, I unlatched the window and pulled it up. I instantly regretted this as a horde of crickets jumped from where they were trapped between the screen and the glass. My bed is under the window and they have now taken shelter under it. I highly doubt that they will be coming out without a fight.

After shutting the window and running around my apartment freaking out, I grabbed my duct tape and my handy dandy hammer/screwdriver and trudged around my building to see if I could figure out a way to tape up the screen, as to not have a repeat of last night. When I got there I could definitely see where they were coming in. At some point some idiot had busted the screen out and the building had not bought a new one.
It’s bend and doesn’t fit the frame correctly, allowing the 142nd platoon of nightly nuisances crawl in and chirp their way into my dreams.
Well that’s not happening again. I duct taped the whole thing shut and went back into my room to try and chase the invaders out from under my bed.

A while later (and as I sat still unsuccessful in my debugging) I heard the dratted chirping coming from the window again!
Knowing that it was now or never I gathered my courage, armed myself for the fight and  marched toward the battlefield. I pulled off the duct tape, popped off the screen with the screw driver and searched for the ninjas of the bug world.

But as you can guess- they were nowhere to be found. I dug around for a while with the screwdriver, but no bugs fell from the side. Finally I realized that they weren’t just behind the screen they were IN THE WALLS...
I grabbed the screwdriver and peeled up my window, immediately finding the rest of the forces hiding the metal lining. It took about ten minutes (and a few curse words that I won’t repeat here) but I finally had them all out of the window. Now mind you, they hadn’t jumped towards the outside- they were now inside my bedroom... of course.

But at this point it didn’t matter. All I wanted to do was patch up the stupid screen, go inside and pretend that the last hour hadn’t happened ( I would deal with the cricket camp under my bed later).

The only problem? When I walked up to my door and turned the handle I was locked out. Now, I share an apartment with Shelbey and I should have remembered that she takes a night class on tuesday, but as a weary warrior I wasn’t thinking clearly and had neglected to take my phone or my keys out to the final battle.

This meant that I was now locked out of my apartment and my car and would be waiting for my roommate who may very well have been out for a few hours. Well that just wasn’t going to happen.

One thing about me- I am a hot head. It’s mostly the little things that set me off. The bugs- annoying. The window- pretty disgusting. But being locked out of my apartment- OH HECK TO THE NO!

I grabbed up my broom and my tape and my screwdriver/hammer and I hissy fitted my way back around to my window. I ripped off that duct tape. I pulled off that screen. I jammed my screwdriver under the window and pulled it open. I then proceeded to pause just enough to look around cheerfully so the neighbors wouldn’t think I was breaking into to someone else’s apartment and pulled myself in.

I now know that the only thing keeping me from being robbed is a flat head screwdriver. That’s literally all you need to get into my room...

The crickets are still taking refuge under my bed, my roommate is still in class, I have homework to do already, but all I really want to do is go to walmart.
Shopping list:
Bricks or Window Lock
Mace
Maybe a Gun?_
A Porcupine_
... or a polarbear_

Onward and Upward

Moving has got to be one of the worst things in the world. There is nothing that truly compares to the grueling work that you are subjected to when packing up your closest possessions. This summer I've moved twice- from college to home and from home back to college. The first time I moved I literally threw everything into boxes. It was finals week and I had to be out 24 hours after my last test. As someone who gets stressed in timed situations I was definitely not in the mood to organize.
I justified my actions by the fact that I had a completely free summer ahead of me and would have time to organize when I got home. Unfortunately, as all good procrastinators will tell you, time seemed to fly by. I worked at a summer camp Sunday night through friday afternoon and my weekend consisted of sleeping, sleeping, hanging out with friends, filling my car up with gas and sleeping. There was really only a couple times that I truly tried to fix some of the messy boxes that I had unceremoniously dumped in my bedroom.
Fortunately summer camp ended two weeks before I was due back at Tarleton. This meant that I had all that time to pack. During that week I attempted to organize but found out about halfway through that the only thing I was doing was moving the stuff from one cluttered box to another.
My parents left on Thursday to help my sister, Kathryn settle into her new dorm (widdle freshman!) and  so I had the house to myself for three whole days. Thank the Lord Almighty, Tom Bergeron and all the meerkats in the world that I had that time and space to myself. I moved everything I was taking back to college OUT of my room and finally had the time and patience to clean and organize everything that was staying.
I stayed up till about 5 in the morning the day before I left finishing laundry, then slept for four hours, loaded up the car and headed out. Luckily it's only a two hour drive and I kept myself alive by chugging coffee like it was living water and blaring my Veggie Tales soundtrack.
When I got there I got acquainted with my new apartment. I'm sharing it with my roommate from last year, Shelbey, but this time we each get our own rooms. As juniors in college it's probably something we deserve by now...
The other girls that were living there were not quite moved out so there stuff was dumped into one corner of the living room. I quickly moved all of my stuff in- I've watched too many episodes of Special Victims Unit to feel comfortable leaving both my car and my front door unlocked for an extended period of time.
Once everything was in I crashed. Spread out my sleeping bag and crashed. The amount of sleep I had had in the last few days had not been good to say the least, and I wasn't about to unpack everything on an empty tank. Naps are glorious. I'll probably talk more about them later, because I do believe that they may be the only reason that I'm still alive at this point.
So there I was- with a room full of boxes, sleeping on the flood because my car isn't big enough to fit a mattress in it.
Like I said earlier... moving is one of the worst things in the whole entire world.